I don’t bash non-Christians. Ever. I still like them. I really like Jewish culture. I never look to alienate a father looking for wisdom and encouragement.
I speak to dads of all different walks of life. I can never say anything without offending someone somewhere. It’s the nature of the job.
I talk about the pros of marriage—the divorced and single dads are mad at me.
I talk about divorce and married dads are mad at me.
Every single subject has people on both sides and in between. My hope is that dads like you are not big softies and can read/listen/watch content that is not meant for them without getting their feelings hurt. The next piece of content might be for you. Might not.
I’m talking to all of you from every walk of life. I speak to my truth. Most dads agree with 90-95% of my content. They disagree with the remaining amount. But it’s a high ratio of more good than bad!
With Christianity, I tend not to push the subject hard. I know some of you have had bad experiences with churches. Because churches have people in them, rendering them not perfect. But most people from nearly every walk of life believe in the core principles Jesus laid down.
- Love your neighbor.
- Live a good life using the golden rule, treat others as you want to be treated.
- Forgiveness will make you happier and more fulfilled.
So, since we all agree on those principles, can we talk about it a bit more? I won’t force baptism on you. I just want Dads to be the best dads they can be.
#1 difference I see is simple. Dad bows down and humbles himself before a higher authority. He respects a higher authority. He listens to a higher authority,
His kids witness this. They see their strong, all-powerful dad on his knees.
Talk about setting a powerful example.
This sets up a real argument the kids that see a strong father humble himself and listen to a higher power—those kids listen better, are less argumentative, respect their father better, are more understanding of the hierarchy of power and authority in the family.
Dad is very practically setting the example of the very behaviors we want our kids to demonstrate.
That’s not to say Christian kids don’t argue, rebel, or stray. Or non-Christians don’t go on to live wonderful purposeful lives. Big picture thinking here. Which path gives us the best chance to be successful. What is the highest probability? That’s the road that makes sense to take. But to each is own
Modeling is one of the most powerful effective tools a father has to influence his kid’s trajectory in life.
In life, we have endless crossroads that come our way. Constant choices to do right vs wrong. What is right and wrong? Says who? A believer lives by a biblical code. (or tries too)
A non-believer is deciding on his own accord what he thinks is right or wrong.
It comes down to where is the line you draw in the sand on a multitude of issues.
Christian Dads have the lines for the most part pre-drawn. We have a book that tells us what is right and what is wrong. This results in a more stable and consistent approach.
Here is another thing I want to be clear about. Hypocrisy. It exists. Churches are filled with people who need to be there. There is no perfection. Every single one of us does wrong. The pursuit of good living is what we are talking about it. There are a ton of Christians who fail in those pursuits, and there are some who are simply faking the pursuit. Let’s not pretend non-Christian folk have no hypocrites among them.
In the end, there is strength and power in demonstrating humbleness, submitting to a higher authority, being kind, showing love, and forgiving. Demonstrating means doing these things. It’s more than just saying it….its living it the best you can. Forgiving yourself when you come up short. Admitting shortcomings and trying again. The example set is massive. Your children see dad doing it, hear dad talking about it, and one more thing……
Write it down. I’m so big on this. Write down your family values, morals, and ethics. Decide what is right and wrong in your family. Put it down on paper and hang it up. Your own family document to hold everyone, including mom and dad, accountable. It doesn’t have to be long or complex. Its just clarifying where you stand so when drama or stress comes along you don’t begin to blur the lines in the emotions of the moment.
Lets Summarize.
1.) Dad himself listens and obeys a higher power setting the example of kids listening and obeying to parents.
2.) Right and Wrong is defined for the Christian dad versus the non-Christian dad that makes up his own system for deciding right and wrong.
3.) Dads that are living a Christian life are setting an example of being the strong leader that can forgive, have understanding, patience, and kindness….Most of us agree those would be characteristics we would lie our children to grow up and have!
And the last point I want to bring up is the community a church brings to the family. There’s a support network. If hard times hit…to celebrate good times….to bounce ideas off of…to learn from…there is a group of people you belong to. Especially for families that are isolated from their extended families, this can be a very powerful tool. Not only for help but for validation and encouragement in living life a good way.